Rule 039 | When In Doubt, Just Ask A Sexpert (Part I)

This week, Jessie and Gerard are chatting with Sex & Relationships Expert, Kate McCombs. They excitedly pepper her with a handful of questions submitted by the Great Love Gang, but you'll also hear a tiny bit about their own intimacy adventures as well. (If you enjoy this conversation, be sure to subscribe to Marriage is Funny on your favorite podcast player, and listen in for Part II that will go live on Friday!)

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  • You guys blew us away with your 70+ responses to our sex survey! Missed the chance to weigh in? Feel free to share your thoughts right here and we’ll do it again if there’s enough interest.
  • The Peppers are currently sleeping in separate beds, and Kate confirms that there’s nothing wrong with a good night’s rest.
  • Q1: How can a couple make time for sex when they both want it, but one (or both) partners feel tired or blah?
  • Kate (figuratively) drops the mic with a helpful tip about reframing the way you set up a sex date.
  • Gerard blurts out his own secret idea for how he setting the scene in order to get busy.
  • Q2: How can someone overcome the challenge of painful sex?
  • The best lube is made from Good Clean Love. (And that's probably the only thing about us that you’ve never wanted to know.)
  • Finding the right Dr. or physical therapist should be the first step towards treating painful sex… Check the National Vulvodynia Association to find a practitioner near you.
  • Q3: I like making love, but can rarely get myself to make the first move. How am I supposed to initiate sex when I never feel horny?
  • The book Come As You Are by Emily Nagaski is next up on The Peppers “to read” list.
  • Q4: I’m anxious about having sex, and we hardly do it anymore. How can I get back to actually craving physical intimacy with my husband (as much as I used to)?
  • Q5: How does hormonal birth control have an impact on a women’s libido?
  • Q6: What are some ways to try and reverse a low libido?
  • Q7: Is there any way to intensify a man’s orgasm?
  • Q8: How can my partner and I climax at the same time?
  • Kate confirms that eight out of every 10 women need clitoral stimulation in order to achieve an orgasm.
  • Jessie and Gerard read YOUR sex-related wish-list in a rapid fire succession.
  • In many cases, having a conversation about what you want out of sex can actually feel more intimate than actually having sex.
  • Q9: What are some ways we bring up sex with our partner without making things awkward.
  • Start small and share things that give you some context for your chats! Kate's website is a great resource and we love her rundown of how to add more empathy to your everyday. 


  1. Name one thing that tends to "press down on the brakes" of your sexual desire.
  2. What is your favorite (most optimal) time of the day to have sex?
  3. Describe your experience of sex-education (either at home or school) from when you were young.

We're celebrating the official start of summer AND the end of Season Two at our finale party on May 29th!  

Find out how to join us right here and we would LOVE to see you then.