Physical Touch

Rule 039.5 | Talking About Sex Makes It Even Better (Part II)

Part II of the sex series on Marriage is Funny! Gerard and Jessie share their thoughts on important things like abstinence, foreplay, and experimenting in the bedroom. The Peppers are joined by expert Kate McCombs, and her wisdom continues to inspire the Great Love Gang to be more intentional toward intimacy. (Be sure to listen to Episode 39 for Part I with Kate!)

Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

QUICK BITES:

  • Q1: My husband says he isn’t a kissing guy, but I need foreplay in order to have sex. How can I fulfill his needs without making him do something that he doesn’t want to do?

  • Cooking is like sex. Creativity and variety are two ways to be very good at it.

  • AASECT.org is a great resource for finding a sex therapist that you can visit with your partner.

  • Jessie’s adventures in finding a counselor continue to be entertaining. (You may notice that Ep 9 in Season One is starting to sound familiar.)

  • Q2: How can we build up more courage in the bedroom? Is there an easy way to tell my partner I think they are boring in bed?

  • Creating a “sex lab” could be the best way to start experimenting in the bedroom... Check out Kate's article about how to set the mood in your own home.

  • Q3: Is there a right way or a wrong way to suggest the use of toys and tools?

  • Never break the laws of bad sexual etiquette... The pleasure of your partner matters just as much as your own.

  • Gerard and Jessie were sure to park in the back when they drove to the sex shop in Episode 20.

  • Q4: What do I do when my husband wants it and I don’t? Is faking it ok?

  • It’s important to tell our partners exactly when and how they’ve blessed us in order to build up their "cushion" when times are good.

  • Q5: How can I initiate sex when I know my partner doesn’t feel like it?

  • Kate explains the difference between justification vs clarification when it comes to turning down your partner when they’re making a move.

TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

  1. What is the most surprising thing that your partner has ever done in bed?
  2. When was the last time you talked to your partner about sex? When was the last time you talked to someone besides your partner about sex?
  3. What was the most intimate moment that you had with your partner this week?

We're celebrating the official start of summer AND the end of Season Two at our finale party on May 29th!  

Find out how to join us right here and we would LOVE to see you then. 

    Rule 039 | When In Doubt, Just Ask A Sexpert (Part I)

    This week, Jessie and Gerard are chatting with Sex & Relationships Expert, Kate McCombs. They excitedly pepper her with a handful of questions submitted by the Great Love Gang, but you'll also hear a tiny bit about their own intimacy adventures as well. (If you enjoy this conversation, be sure to subscribe to Marriage is Funny on your favorite podcast player, and listen in for Part II that will go live on Friday!)

    Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

    QUICK BITES:

    • You guys blew us away with your 70+ responses to our sex survey! Missed the chance to weigh in? Feel free to share your thoughts right here and we’ll do it again if there’s enough interest.
       
    • The Peppers are currently sleeping in separate beds, and Kate confirms that there’s nothing wrong with a good night’s rest.
       
    • Q1: How can a couple make time for sex when they both want it, but one (or both) partners feel tired or blah?
       
    • Kate (figuratively) drops the mic with a helpful tip about reframing the way you set up a sex date.
       
    • Gerard blurts out his own secret idea for how he setting the scene in order to get busy.
       
    • Q2: How can someone overcome the challenge of painful sex?
       
    • The best lube is made from Good Clean Love. (And that's probably the only thing about us that you’ve never wanted to know.)
       
    • Finding the right Dr. or physical therapist should be the first step towards treating painful sex… Check the National Vulvodynia Association to find a practitioner near you.
       
    • Q3: I like making love, but can rarely get myself to make the first move. How am I supposed to initiate sex when I never feel horny?
       
    • The book Come As You Are by Emily Nagaski is next up on The Peppers “to read” list.
       
    • Q4: I’m anxious about having sex, and we hardly do it anymore. How can I get back to actually craving physical intimacy with my husband (as much as I used to)?
       
    • Q5: How does hormonal birth control have an impact on a women’s libido?
       
    • Q6: What are some ways to try and reverse a low libido?
       
    • Q7: Is there any way to intensify a man’s orgasm?
       
    • Q8: How can my partner and I climax at the same time?
       
    • Kate confirms that eight out of every 10 women need clitoral stimulation in order to achieve an orgasm.
       
    • Jessie and Gerard read YOUR sex-related wish-list in a rapid fire succession.
       
    • In many cases, having a conversation about what you want out of sex can actually feel more intimate than actually having sex.
       
    • Q9: What are some ways we bring up sex with our partner without making things awkward.
       
    • Start small and share things that give you some context for your chats! Kate's website is a great resource and we love her rundown of how to add more empathy to your everyday. 

    TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

    1. Name one thing that tends to "press down on the brakes" of your sexual desire.
    2. What is your favorite (most optimal) time of the day to have sex?
    3. Describe your experience of sex-education (either at home or school) from when you were young.

    We're celebrating the official start of summer AND the end of Season Two at our finale party on May 29th!  

    Find out how to join us right here and we would LOVE to see you then. 

    Rule 038 | Proper Hand-Holding Takes Years Of Practice

    Gerard divulges the back story behind his drinking habit, while the duo invites you to join them in making their signature drink, a Pepper Margarita. Jessie craves a certain kind of physical touch... as long as it means her fingers don't go numb.

    Hard to believe we're nearing the end of another season, but that means we're now accepting sponsors for our next round of the show!

    Contact us directly for more info, and be sure to save the date for our finale party on May 29th.
     

    QUICK BITES:

    • We’re almost to 96 ratings on iTunes! Help us pass 100 this week? We'd love to have your support, and you can head over here for instructions on leaving a review.
       
    • The recipe for a Pepper Margarita: Take 2 slices of jalapeno (seeds removed) and muddle in the bottom of a shaker. Add 1.5 oz of tequila, 1 oz of triple sec and 1 oz of lime juice (from a REAL LIME), shake and pour over ice in your favorite glass with a salted rim!
       
    • Just in case you live nearby and want to try the pineapple-infused tequila that Jessie tried recently… Head to Agaves Kitchen in Long Beach!
       
    • Jessie’s narcolepsy might have been contagiously caught from this character back in Season One.
       
    • The Peppers may have met at a school with strict rules, but that hasn't stopped them from embracing the joy of a nice glass of tequila. 
       
    • Share a virtual drink with The Gang on Cinco de Mayo! Make yourself a Pepper Marg, snap a pic and share with us on social media using the hashtag #GreatLoveGang.
       
    • Jessie admits that she loves holding hands, but Gerard hasn't always believed in the importance of using the right technique.

     

    TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

    1. Who are your top three favorite people to share a cocktail with?
    2. What version of physical touch makes you feel most connected to your partner?
    3. Do public displays of affection make you feel uncomfortable or incredibly loved?

    Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

    Rule 036 | The Lifespan Of A Mattress Is Only Eight Years

    Jessie wants to experiment with sleeping in other beds, but Gerard cares more about earning reward points while doing it. The Peppers commit to filling their year with travel, and they both decide to be more intentional about tucking each other in at night.

    Hard to believe we're nearing the end of another season, but that means we're now accepting sponsors for Season Three of the show!

    Contact us directly for more info, and be sure to save the date for our finale party on May 29th.
     

    QUICK BITES:

    • Sharing so many of our favorite things this week, but no money has exchanged hands in the making of this episode.
       
    • Listen to Episodes 23 + 27 to catch up on Gerard’s crazy work schedule and frequent travel situation.
       
    • Jessie admits that there are many benefits to having the whole house to herself.
       
    • We’re still on a mission to get Lester Holt and his wife Carol on an episode of Marriage is Funny... Send him a tweet and let's swarm him with some social media love!
       
    • Jessie’s mornings begin with her fancy french press and a simpler version of this Rocket Fuel Latte.
       
    • Check out The Points Guy and find out how to earn a Southwest Companion Pass for free.
       
    • No cross-county tour for us this summer, but we ARE excited to pop around to a few of our favorite US cities! We want to hang out with you, so let us know if you'd like to host a little shindig.
       
    • Gerard packs his "whole shebang" in his killer travel set from Vessel.
       
    • No one is surprised that Jessie’s meticulous systems apply to her travel snacks as much as her regular eating schedule.
       
    • Tree-huggers will love the Make A Green Choice plan from all Starwood Hotels.
       
    • The conversation about separate beds is sure to ruffle a lot of feathers, but one thing we know for sure is that flipping over in a squishy bed is very inefficient.
       

    TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

    1. If you could fly with your partner to any place in the world for free, where would it be?
       
    2. Do you know any other couples who sleep in separate beds? Have you ever considered it?
       
    3. How do you usually pass the time on an airplane?

    Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

    Rule 029 | Salads Aren't Meant To Make You Feel Guilty

    The Peppers are officially inviting YOU to come on vacation with us in April! We’re taking some listeners to Puerto Vallarta next month, and we can already tell that it is going to be EPIC.

    In this week’s episode, Jessie professes her commitment to the grocery store up the street. While she’d rather stroll the aisles than make a trip to the spa, we learn that Gerard definitely prefers the spa, but expects to get his massages from within the comforts of his own home.
     

    QUICK BITES:

    • A Marriage is Funny proposal! What the what?! Help us celebrate with Ashley and her man in the private MIF Facebook group!
       
    • Jessie kicked her commitment issues and joined the frequent shopper club at her fave local grocery store. Listen in for her prioritized list of supermarket criteria, and get her expert instructions for buying the best type of kale. 
       
    • Gerard’s healthy eating goes out the window when Jessie leaves town. How does that saying go? When the wife’s away, the husband eats junk food...
       
    • Jessie would easily drive across town for her favorite fake ice cream. Arctic Zero and a piece of dark chocolate is a nightly ritual at Casa de Pepper.
       
    • Gerard shares a special recipe for something that only HE can create: Guilt Salad. (With extra parmesan and a side of preservatives, please.)
       
    • The last thing Jessie needs before leaving on a trip is another to-do item… As you may have heard in Episode 8, we’re still working on smoothing out our pre-travel send off.
       
    • The Melt Massage courses have significantly upped our back-rubbing game. Now all we need to do is harness a bit of heartfelt motivation.
       
    • Gerard bounces back from a bad massage experience, and now Jessie is stuck bearing the brunt of his trauma.
       
    • Give Jessie a head of cauliflower and a fully stocked pantry, and she'll gladly make you a healthy feast!

     

    TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

    1. When it comes to grocery stores, are you more of a “wander the aisles” kind of person or do you prefer to make a plan and have your list delivered?
       
    2. What is your favorite way to receive physical connection from your partner?
       
    3. Would you rather have a fully stocked fridge filled with all of your favorite ingredients or a super-luxurious back rub that you never have to reciprocate?

    Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, sign up for our mailing list and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

    Rule 025 | Valentine's Day Doesn't Owe You Anything

    The Peppers have a unique approach to Valentine's Day that can sometimes feel like a bit of a drag. Find out how we stay connected during a lapse of romance, and listen as we stumble towards a system for divvying up the household chores.

    QUICK BITES:

    • Puerto Vallarta here we come! Start packing your flip flops and get all of the Great Love Getaway details right here. Stay tuned for registration to open on February 14th!
       
    • Each couple that comes with us gets a comp Creative Marriages shoot with our friends Michelle + Kelly -- Come hang out with us and get bear hugged at their launch event on Valentine's Day in Orange County.
       
    • Gerard kicks things off with a very directed question, and Jessie tries to skirt around the answer by picking on his semantics.
       
    • Jessie wants Valentine’s Day to be about celebrating love, not comparing each other to societal norms... No fancy restaurants. No jewelry. (Gerard is elated at the fact that this has now been recorded on tape.)
       
    • Gerard understands there is always room for creativity and growth, and wants to be able to give Jessie something to look forward to. He also wants a backrub, but his fingers will be crossed until then.
       
    • The Peppers realize that the whole point of Valentine’s Day is to feel more connected to the ones that you love... There are endless opportunities to shower your partner with romance, but it doesn't have to stop at special occasions.
       
    • Jessie throws in the towel on dish duty. (After a mere 4 DAYS of giving it her all.) She’s confused about the chores around the house because of Gerard’s change of schedule... except for vacuuming. She’s very clear on who vacuums.
       
    • Gerard engineered a tin can tower that has spurred on some feelings of passive aggressiveness.
       
    • At the root of it, we both prefer deep connections over a dozen roses. (But let’s be honest, Jessie would NEVER turn down her favorite chocolate bar.)

    TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

    • When was the last time you felt romanced by your partner?
       
    • What is your least favorite chore of allllll time? 
       
    • Would you rather celebrate Valentine's Day with a really good back rub or the darkest chocolate that money can buy?

    Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, sign up for our mailing list and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!