Expectations

Rule 032 | Separate Closets Are The Key To A Happy Marriage

You might already know our guests Damien + Grasie from their pop-culture status, but The Peppers simply know them as a couple of fun friends who are always loaded with laughs. Listen in as Jessie + Gerard chat with them about improv comedy, mischievous cats, and that one time when Damien got mad enough to throw a chair. 

CONNECT WITH THE DUO ONLINE:

Find Damien on Twitter / Snapchat / Instagram - @damienfahey
Find Grasie on Instagram / Snapchat / Twitter - @grasiemercedes
(+ be sure to check out her style blog for endless amounts of inspiration!)

Don't Forget: We are headed on vacation together in April and we want YOU to come with us! A group of our fabulous listeners are joining us in Puerto Vallarta next month, and we can already tell that it is going to be EPIC... We have room for just one more couple, so snag your spot and let's hit the beach.

QUICK BITES: 

  • The fun in the FB group included words from Mark the mailman, a fairy-godcouple that sent us on our flea market date, and FINALLY the recipe for Jessie's eggplant tacos.
     
  • Save the Date for our big party in Long Beach on May 29th! The Peppers will be celebrating the wrap of Season Two, and we can't wait kick off the summer together. 
     
  • Damien tells us what it's like to always and forever be "The MTV Guy." (Among other things!)
     
  • Consider this a friendly reminder that your husband might be funnier on twitter than he is in real life.
     
  • Being coupled-up has given this pair a serious advantage on the comedy stage. (More proof of our theory that things are better when we're together!)
     
  • This duo AND their friend Dave Holmes recommend iOWest for improv classes in LA.
     
  • The Faheys biggest fight involved a chair being thrown. But other than that, they hardly ever argue...
     
  • A neo-neat-freak admits she has a problem, and that is the first step. 
     
  • The secret to a happy marriage is most definitely keeping separate closets.
     
  • The collective form of the word "MY" applies to parents, weddings, bedrooms and favorite pets.
     
  • Cats are nearly impossible to control. Cute as they may be, having one at home is not for the faint of heart.
 
Dakota The Narcoleptic Cat

Dakota The Narcoleptic Cat

 
  • The Peppers share about how their first kitten ruined their first Christmas and simultaneously made them an official "dog family."
     
  • Family frames of reference can have a huge impact on marriage roles, and both couples have let strong connections with their parents be a part of their kitchen duties.
     
  • Snapchat Husband Shaming has to be a thing. Is it a thing?
     
  • Art imitates life when Peter + Lois fight for the toaster.

 

TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

  1. If you had to choose one, would you be on Team Dog or Team Cat?
     
  2. Have you ever secretly (or not so secretly) re-done a household chore because you didn't like how your partner did it the first time?
     
  3. Can you think of a time when you have ever felt competitive towards your spouse? (Creatively, professionally, playfully, etc.)

Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, sign up for our mailing list and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

Rule 025 | Valentine's Day Doesn't Owe You Anything

The Peppers have a unique approach to Valentine's Day that can sometimes feel like a bit of a drag. Find out how we stay connected during a lapse of romance, and listen as we stumble towards a system for divvying up the household chores.

QUICK BITES:

  • Puerto Vallarta here we come! Start packing your flip flops and get all of the Great Love Getaway details right here. Stay tuned for registration to open on February 14th!
     
  • Each couple that comes with us gets a comp Creative Marriages shoot with our friends Michelle + Kelly -- Come hang out with us and get bear hugged at their launch event on Valentine's Day in Orange County.
     
  • Gerard kicks things off with a very directed question, and Jessie tries to skirt around the answer by picking on his semantics.
     
  • Jessie wants Valentine’s Day to be about celebrating love, not comparing each other to societal norms... No fancy restaurants. No jewelry. (Gerard is elated at the fact that this has now been recorded on tape.)
     
  • Gerard understands there is always room for creativity and growth, and wants to be able to give Jessie something to look forward to. He also wants a backrub, but his fingers will be crossed until then.
     
  • The Peppers realize that the whole point of Valentine’s Day is to feel more connected to the ones that you love... There are endless opportunities to shower your partner with romance, but it doesn't have to stop at special occasions.
     
  • Jessie throws in the towel on dish duty. (After a mere 4 DAYS of giving it her all.) She’s confused about the chores around the house because of Gerard’s change of schedule... except for vacuuming. She’s very clear on who vacuums.
     
  • Gerard engineered a tin can tower that has spurred on some feelings of passive aggressiveness.
     
  • At the root of it, we both prefer deep connections over a dozen roses. (But let’s be honest, Jessie would NEVER turn down her favorite chocolate bar.)

TRIGGER QUESTIONS:

  • When was the last time you felt romanced by your partner?
     
  • What is your least favorite chore of allllll time? 
     
  • Would you rather celebrate Valentine's Day with a really good back rub or the darkest chocolate that money can buy?

Don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes, sign up for our mailing list and send us a tweet if you have something to share while you listen!

Rule 020 | Champagne Bottles Are Always Meant To Be Popped

The Peppers are celebrating their first season finale with a bottle of bubbly and a bungalow full of new friends on the last stop of their tour.

THIS WEEK’S EPISODE WAS BROUGHT TO YOU BY AIRBNB! JOIN US BY LISTING YOUR OWN SPACE ON THE SITE, AND NEW USERS WILL GET A $25 CREDIT TOWARDS YOUR NEXT ADVENTURE. 

TRIGGER QUESTIONS: 

  • What is your all-time favorite beverage to celebrate a special occasion?
  • What is one expectation that you currently have about the upcoming week? How can you communicate that fairly and gently to your partner?
  • If you could pick the theme of our next Valentine's Day progressive dinner party, what would it be? (Submissions welcome.)

Don't forget... Our Season Two premiere will go live on January 6th, but since that feels like EONS away -- We've made it easy to keep in touch in the meantime:

Subscribe to the show ON ITUNES, SIGN UP FOR OUR newsletter AND KEEP IN TOUCH BETWEEN SEASONS BY coming to hang out with us IN THE PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP!

 

Rule 001 | Don't Try to Hang a Chandelier Together in Your First Year of Marriage

We FINALLY kick off our first episode and can't help but hit the ground running. You'll hear a bit of backstory on how we met along with the reasons why starting a podcast feels like an important part of our current reality. (Spoiler: A few of the reasons are self-indulgent and we borrow a page from the book of one of our favorite married couples, Rob + Kristen Bell.) We also start to explore the big dreams and future plans for this little community, beginning with a private Facebook group that you can join right here.

Listen for the story of our first big fight, and a declaration that Rule #1 for marriage should be “Don’t try to hang a chandelier together in your first year.” Jessie shares about how being a wife sometimes make her want to throw things, and Gerard learns that he has set unattainable standards for himself as a husband. We decide together that searching for Great Love (instead of perfect love) is the best approach, and that the accountability of this show will be the best way to do just that.

References: The Zim Zum of Marriage by Rob + Kristen Bell

QUICK BITES:

  • We start the show exactly how Jessie starts her jogs. Which also elicits instant concern from the neighbors.

  • Rob + Kristen Bell’s book is next on our list. His killer podcast is already a shared favorite.

  • We’ve got big dreams for this little community... Join the MIF facebook group to take a podshot at Gerard.

  • The birthplace of our “idyllic” college courtship. (And the movie we saw on our first/accidental date.)

  • Jessie's favorite place to shop for chandeliers and Gerard’s favorite way to prevent electrocution.

  • See our current light fixture above, and get your own swag hooks to be fancy like us.

  • Jessie compares being a wife to this classic pastime and fesses up to temper-tantrum box throwing.

  • Gerard wants to earn a simple trophy for his art of husbandry.

  • We decide to set out on the hunt for Great Love, and then commit to putting our aspirations for perfection to rest.

Try 'em at home trigger Questions:

  • When was the first time that you can remember having a fight with your partner?

  • Which year of marriage has been your most difficult?

  • What does the phrase “Great Love” mean to you?

Talk it out amongst yourselves, and free to share your thoughts with us here!